Tag Archives: Star Wars

The real me

JosiahSugarRush & Rachel Davies

Moments after the life changing revelation

Star Wars. Vegetables. Early bedtimes.

Unlike the above, ‘dangerous’ isn’t a word often associated with yours truly. However, it is time to come clean: My true self struts through the wilderness of formidable cool. I just hide it well. Really well.

One such outworking of my ‘dark side’ is the habitual, intentional corruption of my friend’s children. Through regular brain washing, it is my aim to get each and every one of them addicted to the greatest drug on earth. Chocolate.

Today has been a roaring success. This evening 10 month-old Josiah tasted his first chocolate flavoured item, baked by yours truly. Upon consuming his first brownie bite he then crawled with desperate vigour towards anything vaguely chocolate-coloured with the crazed frenzy that only a sugar-drunk baby can. For the next carnage-infused hour, he managed to smear ice cream on my dress, knock over a glass of sangria and stick a phone in his mouth. I’ve never been so proud.

Ladies and gentlemen, you are reading the words of a badass.

Advertisements